I admit, I’m a “Toriphile”.  I have traveled to attend Tori Amos concerts twice, and each time she tours I obsessively look at the list of songs she played and try to imagine hearing those songs live.  When Alaryyk bought me a Tori Amos for Easy Piano book, I bought a keyboard, and the instrument I played for nine years, but hadn’t touched for ten, became part of my life again.

So, I suppose I’m biased, but I feel like Tori is very relevant to this blog.  She has been called crazy in the media, and totally embraces this “diagnosis” made by music reviewers – she is a modern witch, a radical feminist with a perfect nuclear family, she’s struggled with miscarriages, rape, an ectopic pregnancy – almost everything female bodies can be pushed to endure.  She believes in the philosophy of Carl Jung, and views her life through the lens of the mythology of the goddesses, the archetypes, the rejection of the Christian values imparted by a father that was a preacher man but whom she is still incredibly close to, and that of the wisdom passed on to her by her Cherokee grandparents on her mother’s side, along with other experiences she’s had with American Shaman.

This tune off her latest album, Abnormally Attracted to Sin, embodies the pure joy she exudes, and the mad pride she carries herself with – her refusal to let the fact that she naturally can jump from different planes of reality to this one be seen in a negative light, but instead as a bright light resonating from within, and the Universe, giving her the power to create are incredibly empowering.  If I had to “idolize” someone, it would be her

Tori Amos, “I’m Not Dying Today” (lyrics below)

Tori Amos, \”I\’m Not Dying Today\”

There was a gambler and a cleaner and a puppeteer
only the puppet could explain just what he was
All on a bus we were hopin’ to pass the time
plug my piece in boys then we can drink the wine
drink the wine drink the wine-
music, good friends, I’m not dyin’ today
I Amy be 6 feet under full of wonder
I’m not dyin’ today
Dyin’ today
I’m not dying mister
today
Neil is thrilled he can claim he’s a mammalian
“but the bad news,” he said “Girl you’re a dandelion.”
Dandelion. Hey I need to think about that.
Yeah, I thought about that and I said, “What the Hell?”
He said, “Nope, you are Earth bound, blow them seeds away
maybe one will make a sound.”
Make a sound, Make a sound-
music, good fiends,
I’m not Dyin’ Today
may be 6 feet under full of thunder
I’m not Dyin’ Today
dyin’ today
I’m not dying mister
today
So they got us go goin’ and comin’
Cause they make us pay
if we go or stay
is he prayin’
that I’ll pop my clogs?
if they can’t prove I’m crazy
by noon I’ll be pushin’ up them daises
Tomorrow, with their Donut ox they’ll say “Its sad she’s Brown Bread.”
Hey, I got my weapons-
music, good friend,
I’m not dyin’ today
I may be 6 feet under
way down yonder
I’m not dyin’ today
dyin’
I’m not dying, sister, take your paws off
my ankle straps and my mister
Dyin’ Fryin’, rather have a lie-in
I am not blowin’ that Gabriell’s Trumpet
I got my own band to play today