These are merely an introduction…

[cincopa AkAA00K2HweY]

I happened upon a serious vault of print ads, past and more recent, and most are those that only appear in magazines for doctors – journals but they’re full of ads, they always have been.  I saw one from before 1920 on microfilm once and ads equalled (if not outnumbered articles) far before our current hyper capitalist age. Am I supposed to feel better about their presence dominating so-called “academic” – which is supposed to be somewhat objective, no? – journals being filled with ads for products to give the consumer, the newest and therefore most expensive products, obviously they must be better.  Alright, I must not go for the tangent as the ads are, like the Japanese non-DTC ads (they are directed at psychiatrists, strictly) quite different from the DTC ads.  This reminds me of the way both “chemical” and “Brand” names are just made up by teams of psychologists and other “experts” – come on, Abilify…Effexor… the more subtle like rispiridrone…

(and now a rare glimpse at what my psychiatrist is really thinking about me… )

(dare I suggest that if Van Gogh had been on antipsychotics, he wouldn’t have painted anything?…  )

(and one for the docs!    )

“Pfizer Sushi” …

(I vote for more pharmaceutical ads featuring naked chicks)

(Internet Addiction [to be "officialized" in the DSM-V] was around long before the Internet, of course – this is SCIENCE after all…  )

<speechless>

(this is not the set for the sequel to “2001: A Space Oddyssy, but an exhibit on Abilify at a convention for psy-experts)

And now… The ritalin/prescription stimulant (Dextroamphetamine, amphetamine, methamphetamine, et al.  ) files – Highly amusing and appropriately bizzare…

(a hardhat on head and a lasso in hand… I think this fellow has been taking more than his prescribed dosage… or maybe this is normal, and my conception of normal just that off…??  )

(oh that’s why so many long-haul truck drivers take speed!  Is that a coffin in the second small photo from the left?   )

(aw, pills for mommy and baby to share, aren’t they adorable…  )

(or whacked on speed)

Stelazine: Stelazine (Trifluoperazine) is used to treat anxiety or psychotic disorders such as schizophrenia.

(um, I thought this was a drug to treat schizophrenia… apparently it also cures married men of the annoying obligation to speak with their wives…     )

(but “borderline personality disorder” has nothing to do with schizo…  oooh, I forgot, this is a psych med, and unlike other medications, they can be used to treat almost anything.  Especially antipsychotics… “adding <antipsychotic x, ex/ Abilify> to a cocktail for depression, bipolar disorder” …basically anything listed in the DSM, is very effective.  Effective how?  It turns annoying patients with multiple complaints into speechless, complacent zombies?  Better ask a doctor!  )

(they forgot to mention the drooling bit!  Nothing more relaxing than a good drool…  )

(that is one of the most concise delusional descriptions of the psych ward I have ever heard!  )

(I thought “neurotic” was the opposite of “psychotic”, psychosis being the Hallmark of schizophrenia, which this drug was synthesized to treat… I think it’s time to stop asking questions.  <sigh>  )

(what was that about the decline of culture signalling the demise of a society?  Not that pills aren’t just as remarkable as one of the classic literary works ever produced by humankind, or anything…  )

(am I the only one very, very confused by this ad?  )

(hehehehe “back-ward”, j’ya get it, j’ya get it?  )

(this one is way over my head, too.  I’m not a doctor though…  )

Stop using trifluoperazine and call your doctor at once if you have a serious side effect such as:

• twitching or uncontrollable movements of your eyes, lips, tongue, face, arms, or legs;
• tremor (uncontrolled shaking), drooling, trouble swallowing, problems with balance or walking;
• feeling restless, jittery, or agitated;
• high fever, stiff muscles, confusion, sweating, fast or uneven heartbeats, rapid breathing;
• feeling like you might pass out;
• decreased night vision, tunnel vision, watery eyes, increased sensitivity to light;
• seizure (black-out or convulsions);
• nausea and stomach pain, skin rash, and jaundice (yellowing of the skin or eyes);
• urinating less than usual or not at all;
• pale skin, easy bruising or bleeding, fever, sore throat, flu symptoms;
• joint pain or swelling with fever, swollen glands, muscle aches, chest pain, vomiting, unusual thoughts or behavior, and patchy skin color; or
• slow heart rate, weak pulse, fainting, slow breathing (breathing may stop).

Less serious side effects may include:

• dizziness, drowsiness, anxiety;
• sleep problems (insomnia);
• blurred vision, headache;
• dry mouth, stuffy nose;
• constipation;
• breast swelling or discharge;
• a missed menstrual period;
• weight gain, swelling in your hands or feet;
• mild itching or skin rash; or
• impotence, trouble having an orgasm.

This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur. Tell your doctor about any unusual or bothersome side effect. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.

Medications made with you in mind!

(special treats for non-compliant patients – “Cheekers”, “traders”, “Saboteurs”, and the like)

(Who would try to shirk their Thorazine dose?!  )

(Let me guess – Loxapine?  The stuff that made me forget my name, and admit to the Vancouver Police – such that my permanent record is flagged and any complaints I make are treated as “likely just delusions” – that I have schizophrenia, one of the few DSM-IV-TR diagnoses that I haven’t ever been branded with by a doc?  Of course, this statement must be read with great scrutiny…   )

(Toilets: Many a psych ward’s most dangerous fixtures…  )

(mmm…now in “red” and “blue” flavours!  )

Why Take away when You can add on instead?:

Drugs to combat the side-effects, i mean, extra-pyramidal symptoms, of psych meds, such as Parkinson’s, tardive dyskenisia, tics…you know, a harmless little twitch now and then!

(since psychiatric drugs, as we know, take a nice lot of the “human” out of the individual)

(indeed, the ads that only run in medical journals…  )

(Drug-induced Parkinson’s during young adulthood…sounds like a sure cure for depression/anxiety/paranoia/etc. to me!  )

Psychiatry’s oldest and most reliable market population: The Deviant Woman

(Nothing does a woman more good, more quickly than a little speed, er, Ambar [methamphetamine HCl] )

(couples may also benefit from a daily dose of uppers, or two)

(of course, once you’re on speed you need a sedative to maintain sanity, adorableness, antilethargicness, the ability to “cope”, and all the rest)

(Aha!  The solution to our current crisis of the sisterhood: women are not bonding over pills like they did during the suffrage movement and second wave feminism…  )

(what do you know, more pill-popping could also repair our broken families!  )

(not money, but A.D.H.D. is the cause of the majority of marriage failures, didn’t you know?   )

(I’m no narcissistic nut, I’m just undermedicated)

(time for some creative conditions to account for higher prescription rates… 1) “Battered Parent Syndrome”  )

( …2) “menstrual dysfunction”…  )

(because everything a woman does is really for the benefit of a man)

Last but far from least, the market population that may soon rival women in regard to psychiatric drug consumption: the child population  (Fascinating how the syndromes of childhood that we imagine to be recent actually seem to merely redefine behaviours that were problematized in the past!  What an interesting thesis this might make, and one that the social sciences and humanities research council of canada would likely be more than happy to fund, if it weren’t for conservative universities like, say, simon fraser university, blocking such projects.  I digress!  Never fear, Could ever be able to call or consider herself to be an actual sociologist <*cough* Prof h. Rimke *cough*>!  Did you forget to take your meds?  )

(no, this is not a joke…  It’s all part of a brave new childhood that is largely going unexplored by media/researchers)

(hooked on phonics… and “o-lan-za-peen”  … I certainly did not feel like playing soccer, or moving, for that matter, when I took Olanzapine.  Oh well, maybe it works different for kids, I mean, no one really knows, right?  )

(Oh yeah… 3) “MDB” or Minimal Brain Dysfunction)

(hm…this one helped me through grade twelve…guess it does the same for third graders… )

(once upon a time, before political correctness had to bugger everything up…  )

(mmmmm…haldol…  )

(this stuff cures daddy issues)

(because we all know “DIFFERENT” is just another word for “WRONG“)

(“stimulant antidepressant”…   )

(this is the lasso dude, after taking Ritalin for five years, isn’t it?  )

(oh, to be “regular”…   )

(it depresses depression!  man, why don’t they just put this stuff in the water?  )

(I have always liked corners.  What is wrong with corners??  )

(the damn pills even cure a bad hair day)